I want to sleep.

I need to sleep.

I am irrationally afraid of sleeping at the moment.

I haven't felt this way since Doki Doki Literature club.

I really need to sleep though. 

School days are bad enough if I stay up till one and it almost 2 and I've got a concert tonight. 

I'm feeling all sorts of irrational emotions at the moment.

Fear, loneliness, jealousy, sadness, anxiety, and worthlessness.

I wish i could disappear, just for a while. Long enough to forget who i am. Long enough to forget how stupid I am and self destructive and rude and lazy and cruel I am.

I am overwhelmed by the things I only think when I'm tired but not really tired.

I am going to regret posting this in the morning.

I am also probably going to wonder what nonsense this post even is.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Hello, for goodness sake, sleep! 

 

 

Also, you are not worthless, or any of those things. Do you think there would a a #Cleaverfans club for nothing? I need sleep as well. I got 13 hours of it at camp, in total. Going to post cheerful, lifting quotes in the morning for you. Now sleep!

 

(I'm getting worried, and going to continue bribing the Skittles)

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

*cringes at my earlier post* three moons it's worse than I thought. Where in the world did those thoughts even come from?

 

Also I'm really tired. I hissed at this kid who sneaked up on me and I spaced out and nearly walked into this other kid.

I haven't hissed at someone in a while.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

I like feeling sad. 

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Too bad.

 

Here:

Stars can't shine without darkness 

 

Prescription: One daily, for as long as possible. 

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

So my sister accidentally shattered my brother's car window and it looks really pretty. Just billions of blue tinted shards of glass scattered all over the seat.

 

Also this is the last week before spring break and not only do I have detention for too many tardies but my friend has a bunch of things she needs to do so we will probably only see each other in band for the rest of the week.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

*violently shakes brain* HOW COULD YOU MAKE ME GO TO SLEEP AT NINE FOR TWO WHOLE NIGHTS IN A ROW!!!! I DON'T WANT SLEEP! I LIKE IT WHEN I CAN'T FUNCTION CORRECTLY!! I LOVE IT WHEN I CAN'T FOCUS IN CLASS AND HAVE CRAZY DAYDREAMS ABOUT CRAZY THINGS!!! IT'S SO MUCH HARDER TO DAYDREAM LIKE THAT WHEN I CAN CONCENTRATE AND I'M NOT TIRED!!! AND I ESPECCIALLY LOVE HAVING A TERRIBLE MEMORY. I HATE REMEMBERING EVERYTHING. SO PLEASE BE A GOOD BRAIN AND LET ME STAY UP REALLY LATE TOMORROW!

(ignore this, I'm not tired and therefore not thinking correctly)

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Ugh I need to be more active.

Super mad at myself because I just realized I didn't post at all yesterday.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

You can not sleep all you want.

 

But you aren't allowed to feel worthlessness, loneliness, sadness or fear AT ALL

 

Do I make myself clear?

 

I sound like an adult

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

XD Okay mom.

 

Also, I got over my arachnophobia today! (I really love spiders but until this point most spiders absolutely terrified me. I used to have nightmares about them and I would get anxious when most types of spiders were around.) I had to save two big black spiders without any idea what species they were with my bare hands and I didn't get bitten! I also picked up an ant without getting bitten!

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

((Also that ant part was off topic, in case it seems like I think they're arachnids))

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Mom loves things that are off topic

 

Like last year my class got off topic, and started talking about North Korea. Our teacher was encouraging it. And then the principal walked it. And joined in the conversation. 

 

Good times in 4/3W

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

One time my science class got into a debate on whether your hand is wet or not when it's submerged in water.

My science teacher finally had to look up the definition to prove that your hand is wet when it's submerged in water.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

XD

 

Once we had a substitute who wouldn't stop talking about Minecraft and we wasted a whole day. That was fun.

 

And at camp we had an instructor who kept cracking jokes with the teachers. Very inappropriate jokes for 9/10/11 year olds. 

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

XD I once had a substitute who put his hands on his hips and started acting really sassy and lecturing us on not having our phones out in class. He looked really old too. 

 

I had this other substitute in elementary, who all of the kids in the school had at least heard about and practically worshipped because he would play music for us, was really fun, and loved everything orange and purple. He was a full time teacher at one point, and he’d literally stolen orange chairs from another school and had painted the walls bright orange and purple. And he wrote on the board in only orange and purple markers. And I only ever saw him wearing orange or purple. Ironically his name was Mr. P.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

me: *covers arm in drawings of eyes*

eyes: *looks like they are staring into my soul*

me: ...

me: ......

me: ...........

me: ...eye am watching you.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

XD

 

Once we had a substitute who did tutoring for saxophone players, in our classroom. He had a prize box and would choose some students a day to pick something out of it. 7 year old me adored him. 

 

 

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

Coool.

I once had a substitute who, at the time I thought had played the tuba, but had apparently played something else. He played a song for my class and it was awesome.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Really anxious and panicky at the moment for stupid reason.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

+5 anxiety

3 6 unreasonable jealousy

-1 self esteem

 

 

 

 

+10 annoyance at youtube ads

what am I even doing

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

don't feel real good right now and I have no idea why.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

But didn't Mommy ban feeling like that? Yes she did. She's feeling nice. 

 

But Mommy didn't ban annoyance at YouTube videos. Feel free to feel that. That's a tongue twister

 

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

 

Here:

 

Promise me you'll always remember that you're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.-Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh

 

See what I mean?

 

 

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{*}Violet{*}

The Forums little sis{*}#GoodinBad{*}Joined: 13th of July 2016{*}#RememberTheLost{*}BFF:Sea-Fire{*}#Cleaverfans: Vine, Miri, Gulfstream and me. And Cleaver

Forum Fam: I give up!

 I might only have one match

But I can make an explosion

 

 

 

 

Sorry, my emotions are jerks and extremely sensitive and get hurt by the tiniest things.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Apparently toddler me was an evil genius.

 

 

Wish I knew where that genius part went.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

o.o

which of my memories are real, and which ones are fantasies and dreams and figments of my imagination.

...I can't remember.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Just spent half a class looking at pictures of bugs and half of science watching a video about a type of parasitic wasp that uses mind control to murder caterpillars. (It's actually way more complicated than that but summarizing it that way is fun.)

I already knew some things about that wasp but it was still really cool and kind of sad because the caterpillar usually ends up starving to death because they're forced to protect the wasp larvae while they're in their cocoons.

 

Anyway, bugs are cool and now I've got a ton of pictures of them downloaded onto my phone because they're adorable and really cool. As I've probably already said a billion times.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

I just saw an earlier post about being afraid to sleep because of Doki Doki literature club. I have one thing to say...........same.

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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

...Someone just walked up to me and asked me if she smelled good. 

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Doki Doki Literature Club was by far the scariest game I have ever played. 

still have trouble sleeping sometimes because of it.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Then whatever you do, do not watch the game theory video on it. There is so much spooky stuff in the code and just *shivers* I am terrified of that game to this day.

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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

Too late. XD

I watched it a while ago. 

I agree completely on the creepy and still being terrified of the game.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

The amount of secrets the creators put into the game is cool and terrifying at the same time.

 

 

 

 

 

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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

I completely agree.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Why is making a new thread so stressful?

I literally just spent twenty minutes reading my newest thread over and over to make sure that there weren't any mistakes and it took all of my willpower to press submit before I chickened out and decided not to make it at all.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Let's change the topic before I have nightmares. Can we do something with our ML characters together? Eleanora needs to talk to people more.
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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

I know Gander needs some friends. I just have no idea what we could have them do.

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Weeeell, They could meet in the library where Eleanora spends most of her time and she teaches him/her what is true and what are lies. That's what I got.
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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

Or they could fangirl over their favorite books together. 

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost

Sure, that could work. Anything works, really.

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Gulfstream

She/Her

Empress of Positivity

 

Forum Sisters: Violet, Lunastar, Bixbite, Riri, Sanetra and more  

 

Forum BFF: Everyone!!!

 

My spirit animal is a Tuna 

 

#NoForumRuler

 

I'm an autistic Christian

 

 

 

 

Do you want to make the thread or should I?

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Cleverfighting

Cleaver

 

If you're searching for the meaning of life

you're already doing it wrong

Your life doesn't need a meaning

It just needs a purpose

In other words, you just need something to live for

~Monokuma

 

You matter, I don't

 

Remember the lost